Where Did the Love Go? – How Did Scientology Get So Mean?

Scientology has changed considerably since I started in the 1960s.  Current church goers may not believe this, but Scientology was fun.  We laughed a lot.  The buzz words, “If it wasn’t fun, it wasn’t Scientology,” were true.  Another slogan was, “Seriousness equals mass.”  It has become very “massy” and sad place these days.  It is an out tech group where a lot of people are dying and getting ill.  It is led by a mean spirited off policy leader and bunch that see families and finances come to ruin.

I began at the LA Org.  It was led by old Dianeticists and Scientologists who knew LRH personally.  They were actually at the Philadelphia Doctorate Course, the Phoenix Lectures and the briefing course with LRH.  They were on all on a first name basis with him and were good emissaries for the church and the state of clear.  It was also made up of ex-hippies who believed in peace and love.  It was a close knit group.  They believed in ARC, especially Affinity.  It was a friendly place; people would hang out at the org because they felt loved and had a sense of belonging.  Over the years orgs have changed; they are glum, aggressive, and can be punishing and abusive in nature, not to mention fairly empty. 

I surveyed prominent independent Scientologists to find out what they thought changed.  How did this fun and compassionate activity turn into a serious totalitarian church?

There were five distinct changes noted:

  1.  The advent of ethics conditions in 1965
  2.  The Sea Org missions starting in 1968
  3.  The FEBCs returning from the Flagship in 1970-01
  4.  The RPF in 1973
  5.  LRH’s seclusion around 1982 and Miscavige’s control of Scientology                                                                             

There is nothing inherently wrong with ethical codes or formulas to improve one’s life.  The contemplation of optimum survival is a prose-like statement and ideal in nature.  But ethics as practiced demoralized a lot of people.  LRH’s butler was shocked one day in 1965 when he was assigned a condition unfairly; he says that it all changed for him then.  One ex-senior messenger who grew up in the church at St. Hill says, “Then LRH returns from being kicked out of South Africa* and is enforcing lower conditions-parents were not getting home to their families and had to remain at St. Hill to do amends, they weren’t allowed to shower and shave, etc.  Staff was wearing grey rags and the morale was shot.”  That along with knowledge reports created an unsafe environment.  Children reporting on parents, friends writing up friends made it seem like we were working in a communistic society.  ( *The former-senior CS Apollo felt that when LRH was kicked out of Rhodesia and South Africa he was never the same.)

One independent Scientologist who was an Apollo trained FEBC ethics specialist says that the ethic’s numbers just don’t add up.  Two 1/2 percent out of 100 are a Suppressive Person plus anyone who blows is also an SP, 20% are PTS, only 1 out of 18 are not a degraded being, you can be PTS to the middle class, homosexuals are all covertly hostile, psychiatrists, psychologists, FBI and government agents, jokers and degraders, and gamblers are all psychotic.  Do the math.  It just doesn’t add up.  It doesn’t leave many people you would want to hang out with.  If read that information without using reason and logic, like the leader of Scientology does, you end up distrusting people and wasting them.   You live a friendless, loveless life where it is justifiable to beat and degrade others, cut ties with your family, and end up befriending a fellow hater like Louis Farrakhan.  

For the most part the Apollo was fun and a spirited place to live and work.  In a lot of ways the group transcended to family.  On the other hand, when a crew member was sent out on mission the beingness (i.e. character) adopted was rough and often brutal.  I don’t know who started it, but it was copied by one and all.  Missionaires demoralized staff with cruelty and enforced threats to get their targets done, especially money targets.  When I was a young auditor I remember being scared by missionaires who demanded hours and policed the LA HGC like we were criminals.   Militaristic scary figures intimidated and punished to get their orders done.  They left a wake of fear and blunted purpose.  A lot of auditors and the above mentioned old friends of LRH left after the first missions were sent from Flag.  Ironically, once the missionaire took off the uniform he or she would return to being civil and kind. 

A former Flag Land Base and Int staff member cites the change in Scientology and its purpose to money becoming more important than anything else.  For the most part, missions were sent when the income was down in an org or continent.  The sea org missionaires were to “put ethics in on the planet,” instead they became money stat pushers.  The way the targets and purpose was carried out lost what Scientology and even the sea org was originally about.

In the early 1970s the key org execs from around the world were sent to the Apollo to do the Flag Executive Briefing Course.  Besides policy training, most of them received the Ls which were experimental at the time.  A lot of them came back powerful without stability.  They acted just like missionaires, screaming, yelling, and bullying to get their targets done.  But they didn’t leave after a week or two, they were there on post.  The org became about stats, not help and camaraderie.  To top it off, the FEBC’s worldwide reported income stats were false.  A lot of dedicated Scientologists left staff, but still remained in the church until the tech went out.  (See my article on the blog home page, “Tech Matters.”)  The orgs were no longer fun. 

In 1973 LRH was speeding along on his motorcycle and crashed.  He broke his wrist and some ribs and was miserable for months.  He rarely moved from one chair in his Apollo office and was in a horrible state.  One ex-messenger says, “I often wondered about LRHs temper and if other people were like that in the real world.”  He became convinced that may of the crew had “CI,” counter intention to him.  He had his personal communicator write Flag Order 3434, the Rehabilitation Project Force.  A lot has been said about it, but basically it was for those deemed “untouchable” and considered an enemy.   In early 1974 he began sending one crew member to the RPF every day.  They were quarantined in the lower hold, couldn’t speak to the crew, ate leftovers, and slept on pee stained mattresses.  They were considered psychotic and not to be trusted until run on evil purposes on expanded Dianetics.  Some of the original RPFers were his personal stewards, messengers, personal aides, top auditors, and his son, Quentin.  It set up a climate of fear and the ship was no longer fun. 

The current leader sends people to the RPF and to the “hole” (a prison-like confinement at Int headquarters) at his whim.  There are no longer ethics gradients in the upper echelons of Scientology.  It is much worse than LRH could have ever dreamed of.  Originally the RPF took about 6 months to finish, now it can take as many years or more.

As I mentioned in an article last February the most crippling change began when LRH went into seclusion and Miscavige and the Broekers took over Scientology’s comm lines.  (http://markrathbun. wordpress.com /2010/02/28/a-new-old-school-declaration-of-independence/)  LRH went into hiding around 1982 because there were warrants out for him to appear in court.  He moved to a small ranch in Creston near San Luis Obispo, Ca. and was never seen in public again.  At that time and thereafter there has been a lot of controversy about what he knew and what he didn’t know and what he wrote and what he didn’t.  The comm lines became unclear and radical.  Talented and loyal staff was declared, made to run around a tree as some sort of twisted rehabilitation, the RPF seemed mild in comparison.  David Mayo and many of those personally tech trained by LRH were rounded up and cast off along with the prominent execs and senior messengers who had turned Scientology into a world religion.  It was an ugly time and Scientology has never been the same.  LRH died and now Scientology has gone mean.

With the ushering in of the Golden Age of Tech and the ushering out of Standard Tech the technology became neither “fun” nor workable.  The tech hierarchy trained by LRH which had been protected in the past was devastated; most of them don’t audit anymore either in or out of the church.  Per one ex-Flag trained Class 6, the current leaders don’t know the tech.  She says that they are delusional by thinking it works the way it is run these days.  But they still try to sell it.  There is a mass exodus of Scientologists leaving because the tech does not work the way it is delivered in the church.  The “Us versus Them” scenario now exists within the church itself for anyone who says the tech does not work or doesn’t pretend it does.

Where did the love go? 

Those surveyed said it all.  Ethics went severe and cruel; money motivation replaced true compassion.  Without compassion and love help cannot exist.

Returning to freedom means leaving mean and turning to caring love and compassion.


  1. //

    Great write-up, Glenn – many congratulations, my friend!
    Brought back many happy – and some unhappy – memories!
    All you need is Love!

    Robin & Adrienne

  2. //


    Having been around since 1964 I can absolutely attest to the accuracy and the time line of the above post.

    I recall like it was yesterday, the chill that perrmeated one’s bones when the ethics conditions were first released. I felt it throughout the org, I could see “the deer in the headlights” look on other staff members’ faces. Being a new piece of tech from the old man, one didn’t quite know how to respond or comment, but it sure didn’t feel good.

    Then the deluge began. Policy after policy came out, detailing all the bad things we might do, had done, and the penalties for them. The weekend BBQs tapered off, going over to a fellow student’s house after course for treats and good comm happened less.

    And then, the first major Committee of Evidence was held on some key execs. I cannot describe the restimulation that enveloped the whole staff when this thing got started. It lasted a week. We were all completely fixated by this event, like we were all being comm eved. Predictably, the “truth” of the findings blew no charge, made no condition better and caused everyone to assume the valence of “being good”. It was a bloody horror and it set the tone for many future ‘justice’ actions over the coming decades.

    I’ve never understood why Ron failed to predict the real impact of this body of his work, on his group. He could have issued most of what he discovered and released with far less damage had he presented it in such a way that it paralleled the beingness, doingness and havingness of the group as it existed at the time. In other words, be kind, compassionate, and care for the group as you set forth a whole new standard of behavior, performance, conduct and the penalties for screwing up.

    Over the decades thousands of Scientologists have had life changing wins from Ron’s ethics tech. But thousands more lay by the wayside from its brutal, politically motivated and criminal misuse.

    In hindsight, we could have prospered and expanded without it. Whatever major expansion we’ve enjoyed over the years was the result of individuals, brilliant and creative and courageous and unbelievably hardworking. I doubt they were following some ethics formula as the sole motivating idea as they crafted their miracles of growth. Most of us know personally these individuals and still treasure them. Some of them have passed on but those remaining still do good works.

    As to Ron getting kicked out of Rhodesia as an event that changed him for the worse, well probably. It didn’t seem to affect his technical output. But he sure changed.

    But the worse change truly was the advent of the bloody minded Sea Org. The early days of the SO were times worth remembering for the reasons mentioned above. But it didn’t take long for it to become what it is today. What will remain mind boggling, is the number and quality of many Sea Org members today. You can’t deny that. In spite of the inhuman suppression around them daily, they shoulder on…till they drop or blow. And there’s so many of them. Let us never forget about these guys or lump them in with the few evil doers, ESPECIALLY THAT SMALL BUT VERY EVIL GROUP THAT GANGED UP ON MARYSUE AND FORCED HER TO GIVE UP ALL HER LEGAL RIGHTS. We all know who they are. They will never ever be forgiven for this. There is no amends for them. Let them prance across life’s stage doing “good works” today. But they are part of the ash can of humanity. I’ve wanted to say that for a very long time!

    Thanks, Glenn God speed.

    I like what you say Glenn. You do know the scene as it was and is.

  3. //

    This is an unedited comment from an former Flag auditor and Scientology exec. I will not censor how people feel about their Scientology experiences or about their experiences with LRH or Miscavige. It is an open forum. My views may not be exactly the same as yours and vice versa and I’m happy for that. In a destructive group we were forced to think and act alike . As my previous blog states, “Freedom begins with being free to think and reason.” If others do not share this person’s views they are free to communicate a response.

    From a former Flag auditor and exec:
    “I got involved in Scientology in 1968. The people I met were an amazing group:
    Many of them were friendly, communicative, animated, intelligent, educated, talented and full of hope. We felt we were doing something important, and the idealism and naivety and enthusiasm of youth was a heady mixture. Learning to audit and seeing people recover from traumatic incidents such as a rape were intoxicating- we became true believers in the tech, and in our dedication we were quick to overlook the inconsistencies when they showed up.
    I for one believed Hubbard’s claim that he was a war hero, had cured himself of being blinded in action, had studied nuclear physics at Georgetown University, I believe it was.

    I joined the Sea Org, did tech internships on Flag, with Hubbard CSing my folders. I got pretty good at my trade and I graduated all my internships. Later I got into management.

    I personally had a knack for staying out of trouble, but I had done a lot of list corrections on people who had received wrong indications during ethics handlings and witnessed first hand how people were destroyed by them, by believing the lie that they were degraded or evil. Correcting them was a personal crusade of mine for a while.

    While in management I got to see Behind the Curtain what was really going on. I gradually realized that Hubbard was a totally selfish man, given to anger rages, with physical problems such as allergies that were off the chart and being very overweight and unfit. Not a superman at all. I saw he had an enormous ego, very insecure and paranoid and was fundamentally dishonest.
    He was not an enlightened man, or even a principled man. For example he let his own wife Mary Sue go to jail in his place over the Snow White IRS infiltration catastrophe – he was a coward.
    When his own son Quentin, a very kind natured man who happened to be gay (which was inexcusable to Hubbard ) committed suicide, I was told of Hubbard’s reaction by someone who was in the room with him when he was given the news. Hubbard was furious, he said; ” How could he do that to me!” He didn’t break down in grief as any normal parent would have done. He was angry because he realized it was a PR disaster that would make him look bad. The tragedy was all about him. (another piece of Scn. tech nonsense was that “gayness” could, and should, be cured. All gays were ” out of valence in the R6 bank”. )

    Later I saw all his telex traffic as he ranted about all the SP’s who were out to destroy him. I added up the numbers, they were way in excess of the SP HCOB. Hubbard wasn’t following his own tech. He trashed good people who I knew well, who I knew personally were not SPs. Anyone who buys the PR nonsense that Hubbard was enlightened and a great man spiritually is misled. They need to do their homework. Don’t believe the PR – talk to people who were there.

    The organization was a reflection of Hubbard’s own flawed personality, with his vindictiveness and egotism revealed in harsh ethics measures, and the fact that he was not basically altruistic.
    He didn’t really care about others – he cared mostly about himself. he wanted power and money and adulation, and he got it.
    Meanwhile he bullied his staff, failed to pay them, and cheated on his taxes.

    Families were split up, parents lost their children, people died from mumbo jumbo physically abusive rundowns, sleep deprivation, enormous mental and emotional stress, and died of cancer and similar physical problems.

    As he got older he developed more physical problems, self medicated via a doctor who gave him whatever meds he wanted. He became cranky and senile and more paranoid,- he was not having any fun and so none of us did.

    Hubbard started off in black magic – Alistair Crowley himself said Hubbard
    was the best black magician there was. Hubbard was very talented and charismatic and could invent stories off the top of his head. Spiritually enlightened he was not. He will one day go down in history as the greatest con man of the 20th Century.

    The ” tech” was a grab bag of very workable principles eg. Dianetics, comm cycle, responsibility processing, and complete science fiction nonsense. He plagiarized from everywhere, meanwhile claiming to be ” source” of everything, so some of the material was excellent. Some was science fiction trash, like OT3.

    When he eventually had a stroke he was self medicating and off lines. There was a power vacuum and people scrambled for power. The most successful – Miscavage and Starkey, succeeded not because of their talent, but because of their utter ruthlessness and selfish cunning, they did what others with more humanity would not do. A bit like the SS or the mafia.

    Miscavage was a virtually uneducated, very short man with a lot to compensate for. He had watched the master at work and imitated him, but had none of his talent, he didn’t know how to inspire as Hubbard once had, only to intimidate. He went for the money, some of which, I guarantee you, sits in an offshore hidden personal account. He belongs in jail.

    Scientology was a flawed starship which has slowly been on an inexorable decline for decades and will finally crash. If Hubbard had been an altruistic, loving and selfless man he could have created something useful that would have survived, he would have inspired others to also be loving and kind, but he wasn’t and he didn’t. Spirituality is about love, kindness, compassion, joy, peace, connection to others and to consciousness.

    It is not about greed, egotism, manipulation, cruelty. That is why Scientology is not spiritual, is not a religion. It is a business. As Hubbard himself told a friend of mine in management
    ” it’s not about the Tech, it’s about the money.”

    And that is some of the story of the Decline And Fall, and why things ceased to be fun.”

  4. //

    This is a comment from Loy Young, LRH trained Class 8, ex CO of ASHO and fellow Apollo crew member:
    Hi Glenn
    Look like you and I got into Scientology in the 60’s……….we can have our 50 year reunion real soon.

    My take on it all…..first we joined Scientology during a time when there were still dictators, gurus, kings, queens………..Hubbard even said the best form of government was a benign dictatorship….groups never did anything useful.

    The Commodore was the guru in my way of thinking and we were most devotional.
    Love was not part of it, but being strong, powerful, free of our reactive mind was the top game in town. Adventure for sure. Definitely fun, indeed seriousness equaled mass….get your stats up, production is the basis of morale and all that wonderful jazz.

    Now to me, for being strong and powerful, you couldn’t ask for anything more.
    Scientology, the Sea Org was not about love or relationships. But does anyone have all the answers, I don’t think so. But if Love and Wonderful Relationships was a goal, then you had to go beyond Scientology, the Sea Org…..keep on the path to a full awakening of self……..loving yourself.

    Sounds to me like you know that Love is the path now, can’t for the life of me understand why you are trying to conjure up Love being a part of that time. The word didn’t even exist, it was affinity.

    Does that make Scientology or the Sea Org bad, no, it was adventure, creating a community at sea, phenomenal team work. Still hard to believe with just a able bodied checksheet that we went to sea as if we owned it.

    We may have cleared our reactive mind, but the emotions which is all about relationships and love, Hubbard just scratched the surface, leaving that journey for us to unfold ourselves if we kept going. But didn’t Hubbard do great giving us the emotional tone scale as a beginning. And who knows where that originated but he was smart enough to give it to us.

    So to summarize, Scientology and the Sea Org were tops tops tops in helping us to become strong, adventurous, powerful and daredevil type fun.

    Love, that’s a different path. I’m just very grateful to have developed my strength, before I started to down the path of Love.

    Written to you with the best of intentions and honest caring.


  5. //

    So hard to believe it was as bad as so many portrayed. Fortunately I knew Ron when he was sociable and approachable, and Scientology was fun.

    It was very much fun in the 50’s. All the new information coming out, people giving lectures and meeting new people. Making friends. Giving group auditing sessions. Book co-auditing. Introducing others. Morals weren’t enforced; we did what we liked and everyone was good with it.

    We became professionals and taught HAS co-audit courses, ran missions, established orgs and always, audited, audited, audited.

    We weren’t angels. For example, there was Vern Townsend, Duane Leazenby, Fred MacLean, Jerry Westnedge and myself who ran group auditing weekly in Tacoma WA in 1955. Vern usually was the auditor, and always we had standby auditors who would come to the rescue of anyone keyed in, getting too uncomfortable, crying, going unconscious and it was all the same people holding the cause points in the group. So one day Vern gets this idea to put those who were passive at cause.

    So we played along. And as the commands went along those named above who usually kept an eye out to help others each pretended to be in difficulty. Vern kept the process going through the confusion, and pointed to someone to help out. Pretty soon those who never did much but be effect found themselves in a position where they needed to do something. Bless their hearts, they each came forth and helped us poor pretended victims. And we let them have their win–never told them.

    It was very wild in the 50’s. Once we started the Church of Scientology of Washington, Incorporated it, got it going. This was in 1956. After we got it established someone from the central org came to visit and said that they needed to put in their own legal filings, so we would have to dissolve the corporation.

    We did, and their attorneys redid documents for the Church of Scientology of Washington State. Same street address. Same clients. In those days if we wanted to start something, we just did. It never occured to us say, “Is this OK?” first.

    Of course the 1965 change of Ethics changed many lives. The focus shifted from auditing to SP declares (the 19 most active people were declared SP or PTS in 1965 in Seattle) S and D’s with endless lists. About 1967 the org changed because we hadn’t had enough symbols of religions for the world to recognize it. I went to the Seattle org and there were 17 staff, all in black habits!

    Changes had occured in the field, too. Field auditors were less and less as they were absorbed into franshises (later missions) and orgs, or simply died. There were some stellar field auditors that most people now have never heard of, Ann Sharp from Tx, Wing Angell and Smokey Angell from Chicago for example.

    What was different in the 50’s was we didn’t do drugs. What changed Scientology was the drug culture. What changed LRH was drugs. This is not a put-down of any kind, just an is-ness. And yes, LRH might very well have said, as someone above mentioned, “How could he do this to me?” when Quintin died. That is a natural response, not an unnatural one. When someone loses someone people react in different ways. Some are in shock, in denyal, in grief, or in anger. Certainly Quintin’s suicide was the death of LRH’s dream and must have felt as a betrayal to him. Not faulting Quintin either–he had his own issues.

    Glenn, if you started in Scientology in the 1960’s you must have known Julia Lewis/Salmon. She an Ken started the LA org in 1958 per LRH’s request.
    When I stopped by there then, they had just two students on course. They built it from there to an active group that was thriving in 1971.

    As early as that, even earlier, was a perceived effort to weed out the old-timers from the group, take the power from them. Who was behind that I don’t know, but those who had been in a long time could perceive it. “They” got rid of Julia and Ken, got rid of CBR, and then the Mission Holders who had built from scratch.

    Most old timers I knew had a long term, whole track view of the game of Scientology. There were those who were on the side of freedom, and those who would use the knowledge of Scientology to harm or control others. We figured that some of those negative beings were taking bodies and getting into control positions in the orgs, infiltrating. The orgs began to take on the color of the enemy. After years of Miscavige, it was in the condition of enemy.

    It’s no fun when you don’t know who you are, who your teammates are, when those who should be on our side are doing something else entirely. Just speculating here, but perhaps Ron saw this developing…saw the trend, was the first to realize that everyone wasn’t who they seemed to be, and wrote KSW to handle that.

    I’m glad he did. It is a tough policy, but it has been tough times since 1965. Not as much fun. Still, I have to admit that the most fun I ever had in my life was going through the OT Levels (original bridge) at AOLA. in the early 70’s. I try to let others now have as much fun doing it now as I had then.

    1. //

      Thank you Pat,
      On my first draft of this blog, which was too long, I mentioned Ken and Julia Salmon and Vern Townsend. They were the “friends” who I was referring to that R knew by name. The Salmon’s were lovely and they knew all of us and treated us well with love. Vern was my first D of Training and taught me how to properly meter. He was the one I mentioned in the “Tech Matters” article that would have us do assesments off the meter and then verify our assesments with the meter, he was a very keen trainer. He made it so simple, “Is the needle moving? or is it still? When did it move?” He was also the first one I saw do “OT” things, he could move things. Thanks for filling in the 50s environment.
      For those of you who you don’t know Pat, she is unique, no “angel” as she says, but a true spirit. She has her own group in Wa. with her husband. Also she is one who strives for the best for her clients and org. .

  6. //

    Glenn you are spot on….I have personally experienced the lack of ARC in the COS. The COS has become a money motivated business racket instead of a LOVING and CARING church.
    Just recently, I shared my story and I’ve heard several other completely DIFFERENT versions of my own story from members in the church. Why is this…could it be that they dubb in what really happened because COS does NOT allow their members to LOOK on the Internet or be in comm with x members. God forbid don’t look at the truth let’s just make up more lies so we can avoid seeing what actually happened. The whole thing is pathetic!!!!
    I’m very happy to be out of the COS and now living my life fully with love and compassion.
    I do notice the Independent Scientologist have high ARC, lots of love and true compassion….
    A much better place to be.

    🙂 Lori

    1. //

      Thank you Lori,
      As Vince and others have said for some reason nice went out the door for the “greater good.” Don’t blame the members, they are affected by mind control and phobias. It takes courage to step away, but before that critical thinking has to begin. It usually occurs after they are personally betrayed then they might venture out onto the internet or listen to a true friend like you whom they know cares and won’t lie to them.

  7. //

    It is nice to hear from Loy. I don’t think I’ve seen her post anywhere else. She was/is a very capable being who shows no rancor but instead focuses on ability which is really the most important aspect of Scientology. Grade IV focuses on ability, the antithesis of which are service facs which signifies old worn out habit-patterns that one cannot disconnect from. This includes attitudes and preoccupations with how bad Scientology or Hubbard were/are. Many former Scientologists and Sea Org Members are stuck in that phenomena.
    Much of LRH’s viewpoint never made it down to staff. Part of it was due to the fact that it really did not have too much to do with their post funcitons. I was indundated with it because I worked in his personal office where I never received any rebuke or harshness save for when we moved to the Land Base and study was suspended while we caught up with a backlog. I complained to HCO that I wanted to leave (like you were supposed to) and I was given a review session by a Class XII where out-int was corrected. The study problem ceased because I was put on the PTS/SP Course which neutralized a lot of the phenomena I was experiencing.
    When LRH failed in Rhodesia, he mentioned that the nice guy valence didn’t work. Private investigators revealed he was being targeted nastily by WFMH, etc. As he saw it, being harsh was not about being nasty. It was about enabling Scientology to survive. This was the classic case of 3rd Dynamic (and arguably 4th dynamic) first. I was not around in the Sixties but Scientology became a new machine during that time, was standardized and became more powerful and popular that it ever had been, especially with the OT levels and what they promised or suggested. The casualties were collateral damage but Scientology, despite quickie grades and other nonsense somehow evolved into a group that was more productive than ever. He knew this. It was a brutal process. He got a result. He also tended to pick up people after the fact. LRH sacrificed others for what was a greater or bigger cause. Was something missed in the process? Sure, but again, that was collateral damage. Deemed worthwhile for the overall cause. I’m not agreeing or disagreeing with LRH here, only giving my knowledge of his viewpoint. The irony here is that LRH himself became a sacrifice. Not only that but his family and his movement became a sacrifice.
    This takes us into Ron’s occult affiliations which are too many times commented upon but not well understood or even poorly understood for the most part.

  8. //


    Thank you very much for this excellent write-up. I also very appreciate the thoughtful comments by others of their opinions and experiences. Personally, I don’t think you have to indulge contributors who simply wish to vent a hateful diatribe in the guise of their personal experiences. To characterize Ron as a “con man” is both unkind and untrue. Con men are shallow and lazy. No one would have or could have done the enormous amount of work and contribution that Ron did out of motivations of greed and glory. The body of Ron’s work is simply unprecedented as far as I know. I would not give such people a forum to speak meanly and hatefully but would just let those fellows rant their venom to one another.

    I too remember the saying, “If it isn’t fun, it isn’t Scientology.” I liked that saying. I have also had the experience of the subject of “ethics” being cumbersome, unfriendly and grim. Strange, because the definition of ethics as “reason and the contemplation of optimal survival” seemed all right. I can also see that the misuse and zealotry in the attempted application of the subject have led to very bad results indeed. I have certainly experienced it that way in my own life.

    Ron attempted to do what no man could do in one lifetime, to take the whole dwindling spiral of this universe and turn it around and get it moving in the opposite direction. He would not be stopped doing it for anything. This led to mistakes, excesses and ill-temper. How could anyone undertake such a thing without committing errors? He could not achieve it all in one lifetime, and perhaps his greatest heartbreak was that society would not broadly recognize his goal and his achievements and pitch in and help out. It was the old story of trying to help a wounded water buffalo out of a hole. He knew the perils, but it was heartbreaking just the same.

    The mean-spiritedness and cruelty you see in present day official Scientology is not a reflection of Ron’s goals but a perversion of them, a vicious alteration and zealotry of the original intent of “ethics” policies that were originally thought of as necessary to safeguard the goals. Perhaps “ethics” did serve to safeguard the goals to some degree, but as they have been attempted to be applied they have not worked.

    Scientology needs a new birth of freedom, and I think it is getting it in the independent movement. The official church of scientology can never win broad public acceptance and is regrettably the most unpopular “religion” in the US by survey, less popular even than athiesm, at this time. The church of David Miscavige, with its dedication to money, celebrities, and authoritarianism, and its willingness to lie and viciously attack its perceived enemies, has ruined the reputation of the subject.

    Yet the body of the tech remains, and through whatever process of percolation can yet be the salvation from the various hells in which life finds itself embroiled.

    1. //

      Thank you George. I didn’t know it was the most unpopular religion, boy…and what you say about a new birth is true.

  9. //

    Glenn, I really like what you wrote and what the others commented. I spent over 27 years in the Sea Org (Int, PAC and Flag) and observed much of what you covered. With the constantly created emergency enviornment, survival equaled unreasonable toughness. That meant the willingness to drive through anything and anyone to achieve a target in the most direct manner.
    No one ever talked of “love” and it wasn’t part of the equation. The high affinity, nicey, nicey stuff seemed to be something sold to rich public in locked rooms with an “In Session” sign hung on the door to ward off the real world from entering.

    I think that one of the biggest challenges for ex-Sea Org members re-entering the real world is to find a balance between love and toughness. I think things like being a parent, even having pets helps a person achieve that balance. I don’t think its a coincidence that such things have been removed from a Sea Org members life.

    1. //

      Thanks Matt,
      You are so right about the celebs getting special nice nice.
      You are very insightful to talk about the challenge of using love and toughness, my dad used to say, “Firm and Fair.” When I first got out of the SO in the 80s my kids were the unfortunate recepients of the tough side. It has taken a lot of years to undo it…. I’m glad you wrote about that, so helpful.

  10. //

    Wow Glenn that sure fills in a lot of holes. I got into Scientology because of what LRH had said about “What is true for you, is true”. I thought wow that makes sense. I had studied many Religions and been brought up with many experiences in different Religions. I had grown up with a respect for all who believed what they individually believed. I figured we all had our own road to travel.Finding what was truth was such an individual thing. During my study of Scientology I found many truthful concepts which I applied and won with and still do. I also noticed as the years went on after LRH passed, a change. I did both sides of the Bridge so as to be informed and more stable. Fortunately my ability to hold a pan determined viewpoint came from what I had experieced and my studies in Religion as a subject. Sadly I saw too much I did not care for being run on the staff and the staff onto the public in Scientology.

    There appears to be a core group who will continue to support without question the COS. There are many good programs that the COS had implemented to help so many people and yet it came down to money, money and more money. I believe a person needs to have their own viewpoint before he/she can move forward to be accepting of other viewpoints.

    I am glad there is Scientology outside the COS. I am an Independent and proud of it.

    1. //

      Thank you Carol!
      You are unique in that you could hold a viewpoint and do what was true and right without something directly bad happening to you. That takes a compassionate person; to feel another’s pain and not support those who committs harm to your friends.

  11. //

    Fascinating data. I served for over 15 years at the Int Base and have my own experiences to build my understanding of the matters upon but I started a bit after LRH’s death. I simply lacked the data on how it all went and who he was. This exchange is incredibly valuable. Vince’s input cannot be over estimated. Could somebody explain about the occult connections as in Vince’s comment? Never heard that before. Also, is anybody writing a book on all this yet? I do not mean a politically motivated pro or con book. I mean a true study of the Man. If not, I would love to get the in-depth interviews going and put a book together. Of course there are survival matters, lack of time and ll kinds of other commitments and all but it cannot be postponed much longer simply because we are risking to lose the input from the awesome beings who were the actual eyewitnesses. Please see my http://www.ThetaWRITE.com and drop me a line through my CONTACT page if interested. And my hat is off to all of you Old Guard.

    1. //

      Thank you Michael,
      thanks Michael,
      Russel Miller’s bio on Hubbard has a lot of quotes from his direct aides and covers the years where he studied Aleister Crowley’s “Magick” which is considered a black art or the occult. I was told by a researcher that some of Armstrong’s data in that book was erroneious, however do your own study and let me know what you think. There are two books coming out soon, but probably not just interviews, but opinions and conclusions made.
      PS I selected your link and typed it in twice and nothing came up other than the header. Check it out and send it to me again please

  12. //

    From a former top Int exec:
    ” I would like to say that the love has always been there it just got covered up with egos and duality. Scientology means well, but having the mantra that it is the ONLY way and that everyone else is wrong and Scientology is right is just a big make wrong. If Scientology would believe ONE of its basic meanings of what a thetan is: unchanging serenity they would realize that the unchanging serenity is LOVE. That they or no one could ever change that! We just thought we did. We did not change the changeless. We really need do nothing to be what we are but be what we already are. SCN sees everyone in the world as less than them. Never truly sees each of us as the same and whole and truly what a thetan is. They always look at the bank/body. It was inevitable that hate would come in when that is what you give. What you give you receive.”

  13. //

    Hi Glenn,

    I too liked this article as well as the comment thread. Most of you are “the old timers” that I came to affectionately and respectfully use as a term and when I did it was meant to mean those trail blazers who pioneered the way through the fits and starts of the Scientology movement. Though it’s been decades now for me as a Scientologist I’m a newbie compared to most of you.

    I got highly trained and processed too. I felt it my responsibility in fact to enable me further on my purpose to help improve conditions on this planet. I realize how much faith I actually operated off of over the years. I bestowed my faith and trust to upper management to guide and manage as per LRH policy and tech. These coveted commodities were required for me to give if I were going to dedicate myself to the task of achieving the Aims of Scientology and do my part. The sacrifices I made to do so were not small. The suppression withstood was great.

    The sadness is that all of the suppression I experienced came from people within the management body of the church, by a few black massed beings bent on destroying I guess. I’ve witnessed this cannibalistic tendency in church management but found ways to deal with it what with “building the world with broken straws” and all. How it is that this group can behave in such a barbaric manner toward it’s own dedicated members is an awesome phenomena to accept yet it became more the rule than the exception, a very corporate every man for himself cover your a** mentality. LRH policy does not guide the church and it’s as simple as that. It’s not the Church of Scientology, it’s something else and so shouldn’t be called by the wrong name.

    I did the full study of our “scriptures” and no where did LRH try to take credit as the sole source of this tech. Peppered throughout the St Hill Briefing Course was Ron’s acknowledgments here and there of the men in history who he pulled pieces of logic and discoveries from – he didn’t give himself the credit for inventing this tech but he did discover a great deal of it through his own research, what he found worked and which fit together with other datums. He also never foisted himself off as perfect or anything even close to it. He does get the credit for and compiling all the data he gathered and ran with to give us what even he called only a workable path to follow.

    If there is some kind of proof that Ron was not blinded or that he was not decorated in the military of that he didn’t study nuclear physics at Georgetown I respectfully request former Flag auditor and Scientology exec who wrote above provide his/her proof. The management body of Scientology has misassigned “Command Intention” to Miscavidge and shoved that down the throats of anyone who still marches to the drum of Miscavidge. I have and always will assign that title to Ron. Any efforts to knock LRH off of his pedestal one I never saw him put himself on is something to back up with evidence don’t you agree?

    Despite my disappointments with the broken straws in the church I believe that the ability to as-is charge will survive because the independent field has the right idea. When I ask myself “what would Ron do?” in these times I believe that he would make sure that auditing was occurring and that the doors to become trained as an auditor were thrown wide open. The independent field has and is doing that. The flame is kept burning – a flame that I saw and which has lit the way for anyone who looked that this is something that can help do good for all and no one gets to say it’s not our right to do so.

    It’s an honor to engage in communication with fellow travelers of a similar path taken for all the right reasons.


    1. //

      Thank you for your thoughtful response.
      Re yours: “If there is some kind of proof that Ron was not blinded or that he was not decorated in the military of that he didn’t study nuclear physics at Georgetown I respectfully request former Flag auditor and Scientology exec who wrote above provide his/her proof.”
      I will contact him and if hopefully he will answer you. In my own experience R did need glasses, but didn’t wear them in public. One of his best friends said he would often walk by him and not recognize him, it was his opinion was that he did not see well. As far as curing his own blindness, from what I read there is no record he was blinded in the WWII. One person I know who did further research on Rs bio after Amrstrong left might have the archival info on his actual war injuries. So we can check into it for you.

      There is contradictory info on Rs claim that he discovered all of Scn, in his books especially “Evolution of a Science” he credits the “giants” that came behore him like Christ, Buddha, Freud, Descartes, Rousseau, etc. In Keeping Scn Working he does not. But as you say he came up with a workable system. I think the main thing for those who are independent is to regain freedom of thought, be exterior to Scn as a subject and with that have the ability to be critical, in the best sense of the word, and think rationally.


      Below is the answer from the auditor/exec you queried:
      “Hi Glenn,
      my reference was, I believe, the book: Bare faced Messiah,
      The True Story of L Ron Hubbard by Russell Miller,
      which I read with jaw dropped many years ago, as one lie after another was exposed.
      I read a number of books on Scn. which were published by big publishers, which are required to offer proof and have teams of lawyers to prevent expensive claims and lawsuits.

      I read these many years ago, and no longer have the book, but I remember the those facts.

      These other sources provide other amazing information and are recommended reading for anyone who wants to get a grasp on the truth about Hubbard.
      I found Atack’s comparison between Aleister Crowley’s black magic work and Hubbard’s writings very interesting. Who knew how much magick were were using.


      BARE-FACED MESSIAH: THE TRUE STORY OF L. RON HUBBARD, by Russell Miller. http://tinyurl.com/3d2sk

      L. RON HUBBARD: A CHRONICLE (Church of Scientology official Hubbard biography) http://tinyurl.com/yq3tu

      L. RON HUBBARD: MESSIAH OR MADMAN?, by Bent Corydon and L. Ron Hubbard, Jr. a.k.a. Ronald DeWolf. http://tinyurl.com/2jh3g

      It is up to all of us to do our own investigation and find out what is the truth. The truth will give us the information we need to make informed decisions, judgements and free thought.

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